Each day when my emotion takes over, its like I am living my nightmare all over,I try blocking my feelings so the pain wont be too bad, sometimes the pain is so bad that my breathing stops, there are times when I even wonder what is life, Shereene and Paul makes me feel I have to carry on with life. Every day I ask god why? did I do something wrong. my life dont have much fun anymore; its wrong to say, but thats how I feel about life, some people would say its wrong I shoulden think that way, because I have two children who loves me. I love all my children ,but one part of a whole is missing.